The fastest way to get your children (or anyone) to maturity is to allow them the freedom to make as many choices as early as possible.
Need holds on, love let's go.
Let go of expectation, let go of requirements and rules that you would impose on your loved ones for they are not loved if they are restricted, not fully.
This applies to yourself as well. You don't truely love yourself if you give yourself less than total freedom in any area of life.
Choices are not restrictions. Do not call the choices you have made, restrictions.
Teach your children to make good choices, the kind that are likely to lead to a happy life.
Share what you understand with them about that.
But be careful not to impose your ideas, rules and choices on another.
Create strong boundaries as a parent (or partner to someone), to guide them, this is your role, but do not seek to control them.
And don't withdraw your love if they have made what you believe to be bad choices....this is precisely the time to show your love.
To be fully present, open and real, without a hidden agenda with someone, is loving them unconditionally.
Unconditional love is who you truely are.
When you allow yourself to be this love with others in any given moment, this is when all the struggle goes away.
Therefore, when in a 'tough' situation, ask yourself 'What would love do now?'
And, trust the answer.
Second guessing it can make you fool yourself.
If you come from a place of love in all things, in all your choices and decisions, you can live with yourself in acceptance, knowing that you did your best and will continue to do so.
I am not saying that this is easy to do, and don't expect yourself to be amazing at it all the time, but if you keep reminding yourself when faced with tough situations, to live from this philosophy, then it might make things a bit easier for you and those around you.
Another question I like to ask myself is, "What if it all works out?"
I love this question because asking it immediately makes me focus on what could go right!!!!
From a fellow student of life who is constantly learning. 😉
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